A Little Lost

Will this never end?
I thought a while ago that I knew what I wanted, that I knew where I was headed and that I would sacrifice practically everything to get there.
But lately I'm not so sure.
Then again it could be the impending soon-to-be unemployed again depression that's getting to me.
I'm not sure exactly what to do and how to do it if I ever make up my mind.
Thing is, I want to go to Tokyo to study for 6 months up to a year...preferrably a year...BUT I'm not sure if I'm willing to take any more loans to get there. Thing is, I have to have a whoooole lot of money to even get there and setting up living expenses, tuitions and stuff and then there's taxes and travel fees and if I am to save up for all of this, I won't be able to go until I've worked for 4 years.
And I want to go NOW! T__T

I do feel a bit lost. But my intuition is telling me I should probably try to get a job in my own country first, so that I have experience in the field, before I start heading out for another country.
So now, all I need is a job I guess.
Anyone got a job for me out there?? I'm eager and willing to work hard and earn some money!



...If I was rich, I wouldn't be having this problem...I would just go anywhere I like, follow my every whim, go where my heart takes me...